Harder Than A Mission
by Kyo1
Summary: Duo deals with depression. Mild Yaoi 1+2, Death???
1. Default Chapter

Harder Than a Mission

Harder Than a Mission

By: Kyo

Warning: Mild yaoi, 1+2/2+1, Angst, Death?

Rating: PG

Disclaimers: This is my first fan fiction to go on here so don't kill me! I don't own Gundam Wing, or the Characters or anything! All belongs to Sunrise! I have no money! Don't Sue!

On with the show!

I'm me. I'm Duo Maxwell. Shinigami, The Great Destroyer, I'm me. They just can't accept that can they?

Everyday I wake up and I put it on. My mask. It covers up my feelings and secrets. Breakfast, Lunch, Dinner, the whole day, no one can tell what I hide by my jokes, pranks, and smile. They'll never know.

I can feel, just like every other damned fool who lives in the stupid house. All five of us. I can feel the pain, the happiness, not like Quatre, but just emotions. But most of the time, it's pain. "Shut up Maxwell!" or "Baka." It might not seem like much, but such small words, such small statements, can do so much.

Especially when they come from him. I don't know how it happened but it did. Maybe it was his eyes. Those deep cobalt eyes, they pulled me in. I try to be nice, occasionally try to make him smile, and it never happens. Him being nice back or smiling is just not humanly possible. What I get back is an icy glare or a rude insult.

Why? Why God did I fall in love with him. He's fucking straight. Him and Ms. "Queen of the World" would be so much better, than me and him. And if he ever found out about how I feel, ALL HELL WOULD BREAK LOOSE!

I have nothing. No happiness, love…. Maybe I do have something. Pain. That's all.

*~~~*

"Duo?! Where are you going?" Quatre asked, snuggled up close to his koi. Trowa turned away from the t.v. to look at Duo.

"Bridge." Duo swung a blue-jean jacket over his shoulder." I'll be back… maybe." He had no smile just a straight face, not the normal Duo.

"Duo what's…." The Arabian began but was interrupted by the slam of the door. "What did he mean by maybe?" H e turned to face Trowa. A concerned look consumed their faces.

"Maxwell's not himself. We should go see what's wrong." Wufei put the black chess piece down, stopping the game that he and Heero were currently playing.

"I'll go." The slightly nasal voiced boy stood up. "Back soon." He walked out the door, before anyone could object. The flip of a chestnut braid caught his attention as it disappeared around the corner. "Duo…."

*~~~*

Duo, do you know what you do to me? I can't stand to see that sad look in your eyes. I want the happy Duo back. The one who would secretly make me smile and laugh when no one was around. The one who makes my stomach turn when I see your face, or hear your voice. It took me so long to figure out what I was feeling. I want to tell you so bad. But, do you know how hard it is for me to say it. But if I do what are you going to do, react. Will you reject me or do you feel the same for me? "Duo, I need you." What's happened?

*~~~*

"Kyoto Bridge. Easiest place to disappear." Duo jumped over the railing, inches away from death. "It's your fault Heero! It's your fucking fault." Tears started to slowly fall down the ex-gundam pilots face. "It's your fault." He whispered. Violet eyes surveyed the rushing water below him. He took small steps forward, toes dangling off the edge and stopped. 

"One more step and you can end this, your pain. It can be all gone." The voice in his head hissed at him. "Go! End your pain."

"End my pain…." Duo took a step forward ready to fall off, but was whipped backwards by his hand and turned around to face cobalt eyes.

So how was that?

::twiddles fingers::

I tried really. I did! Read and Review Please!!!

Duo: What the hell am I doing listening to the voices in my head?

Heero: Duo, don't you usually do that?

Duo: Oh yea good point. Hey do I die? I don't wanna die! At least not from those stupid voices in my head.

Heero: If they're so stupid then how come you listen to them.

Kyo: Alright you guys. Stop! Maybe you die I don't know. I haven't thought of the rest of the story. Yet ^_^()

Duo, Heero: -_-()

::Wufei pops out of no where with a spoon. Starts chasing Kyo::

Wufei: INJUSTICE! I BARELY GOT A PART IN THIS STORIE SO FAR! AND WHAT WAS I DOING PLAYING CHESS? WHAT A GAY GAME!

Kyo: AHHHHH!!!


	2. Your Fault

Harder Than A Mission Chapter 2: Tears of Pearls By: Kyo 

Warning: Mild yaoi, 1+2/2+1, Angst, Death?

Rating: PG

Disclaimers: This is my first fan fiction to go on here so don't kill me! I don't own Gundam Wing, or the Characters or anything! All belongs to Sunrise! I have no money! Don't Sue!

On with the show once again!

//….// = spoken to self

//"Shit!"//

Cobalt. Cobalt. Cobalt. Mad eyes. Duo could only stare into them. Tears consumed his face once again.

"What the hell are you doing?!" Heero's voice was harsh with anger. Duo broke down crying. His knees buckled and he crouched down on the ground, wrapping the arm that was free around his knees. "I asked you a question!" Heero's eyes intensified. He gave Duo one of those glares. The kind you can feel.

"I don't want… no more…." The braided pilot repeated the same sentence over and over. He continued to rock back and forth, his wrist still in Heero's hand.

//"Why am I like this? Why do I act like a jerk to Duo? Why?"//

Heero released his harsh grip on Duo's wrist and studied his troubled friend. Duo continued to chant still rocking back and forth. "Duo, what's wrong?"

Soft. His voice was soft with concern. How Heero's emotions, no, voice changed so fast, Duo didn't know. "Duo!" His head snapped back to reality, as Heero pulled Duo to his feet. "Duo, are you okay!?"

Duo stared once more back into those cobalt eyes he loved so much. "W… why? Did you do that?" Duo's voice cracked as he spoke.

Heero hesitated before he brought himself to the one conclusion that was so very true. "Save you. I had to. If I hadn't I would never have been able to live with myself." Warm, callused hands were then placed on Heero's face. Cupping his cheeks gently.

"Heero…." Duo slowly brought the faces together. "Duo…, aishiteru…." Heero whispered before it happened. Soft warm lips came together. A sweet, silent, plea. A plea for each other. Then it ended. Duo brought his body back and whispered… "Goodbye, Heero."

Everything happened in slow motion from then on. Heero slowly opened his eyes and saw Duo slowly fall back towards the water.

Heero fell to his knees and reached out to save Duo once again.

He missed

"DUO!"

Duo opened his eyes to see small droplets of water fall from Heero and his sill our stretched hand.

The droplets of water fell on his cheeks. Duo's eyes widened in horror as he realized, they were tears.

Tears of pearls.

Heero's tears.

//"Heero's crying because of me!"//

"HEERO!" Duo yelled, his last word, his last name.

????????Owari????????

Read and Review, Onigai!

Kyo: I'm sure that's not gunna b the end. I think I'll write a sequel.

Duo: ::startscrying:: I didn't want to die!!!!! WAHHHH!

Heero: ::patsduoonback:: It's ok. We'll just blow her up in our Gundams. Hey! Why aren't u a ghost?

Kyo: Did ne of u read sequel up there? I'd never do that to duo! ::givesduohugtillheturnsblue::

Duo: Let go… b4… I really… do… die!

Wufei pops out again: I didn't get a part in here either!! Onna, you're gunna die! :onceagainKyogetschasedbyspoon::

Kyo: AHHHHHHHH!


End file.
